Friday, April 6, 2007

I Want A Man Like Jim Henson

Gentle, funny, creative, kind. Looks good in Seventies clothes like beards and turtleneck sweaters. A taste for the sick and twisted but man enough to be sweet and serious and talk openly about feelings.

Two words that don't go together= SEXY. PUPPETEER. But look at those eyes. That nose. Those teeth. That smile. This is a man you'd want in your bedroom. If not, you can go to my place and I'll go to yours. Use the big grey remote for the TV and make sure it's set to Channel 4. I put fresh sheets on the bed.

Jim aged handsomely, gave grants to struggling artists and his only vice was fancy cars. Frank Oz said he never once heard Jim raise his voice. He made the first Kermit out of his mother's old coat and once said, "The most sophisticated people I know - inside they are all children." Had he met me Jim would have been impressed by my burping skills and dead-on impression of a clogged drain.

I want a man like Jim Henson. Just not anyone's hand up my butt. I find that controlling.


Sarah said...

I can never reconcile my feelings for JH. I love him, but he also reminds me of my dad. In a good way! But, you know... that gets messy.

Frank Spartacus said...

I been thinking about that beard thing for some time. My dad had one from my ages for the rest of his life. Meaning I never saw my dad's chin.

I've been mulling over the type of beard I'd like and have been perusing this site - if anyone can help me choose, I'd be grateful

On Henson/girls/love, Am I to understand that some girls like boys who put their hands up their bum and make funny voices? I've never tried this, but in my quest to be a caring, sensitive and understanding gentleman, I'd be willing to try this once. i can do a great Miss Piggy 'Hiiiiiyaaaa!' sound.

70's clothes. This is me and my mate last week. How '70's is that?

Anonymous said...

Speaking of sick and twisted, I especially love the shot of Jim Henson in this video.

octopus8u said...

There ARE some sexy puppeteers. I am one, (straight girl, though -- sorry). I have a crush on another sexy puppeteer, but he is about a foot shorter than me. Most of the other puppeteers I know are boy-looking girls who like girls.

I've found gentle men to be ultimately very confusing and furious inside.

half the battle said...

i had an overly emotional paranoid reaction to jim henson's death, which occurred when i was 9. i walked around sad and paranoid i was about to die at any second. my mom loved it. i think his death caused me to contemplate my own mortality at the ripe old age of 9.
he is quite a looker though.

Erin Bradley said...

halfthebattle - I worried about death as a kid way more than I do now. When my mom told me about the Jonestown Massacre it scared the shit out of me. I would sneak into the adult section of the public library and look through the 3 Jonestown books they had and scare the shit out of myself reading them. I was worried I would somehow to tricked into joining a cult or do so out of my own free will and perish in a south american country. but what kid DOESN'T worry about that???? seriously

Darrell said...

I want a girl with toes like Uma Thurman.

Rune said...

erin, blogger is a cult.