Friday, January 2, 2009

fun with google image search: 'church dress'

This is a party baby. Let there be no doubt. You're all like, "SHHHHH, baby! We're in church!" and she's all like, "Fuck that, I'm going to put on mommy's leg garter! What up, Father O'Donovan? Pass the wine!"

Hey Future Shitty Popular Girl: Why don't you do the kids in your 9th grade class a favor and nibble on some of that poinsettia for a while?

Leopold and Debra met on DoggieChristianSingles. She introduced him to the Missionary position. He introduced her to blotting paper and obscure Renaissance architecture.

Don't worry, little one. I know a good torso tailor. He does excellent work. Very little scarring.

Isn't it weird how you can just look at someone and know what their deviled eggs would probably taste like?

Oh Krystal. I don't know if it's appropriate for Bible school, but I do love that you look like a dressy Hershey's Special DARK.

She looks like a rose. The silk kind you buy in a tube, right before you chuck it out and make it into a crack pipe.

SECT 104F ADVANCED FLORAL ARRANGING, WITH PROFESSOR BABY YODA: In this course students will continue to build upon and refine all previously established bouquet-making techniques, including Sith Lord funeral arrangements, nerf-herder gift baskets, and Wookie corsages. All students must complete a Jedi Knight centerpiece as their final project.