Wednesday, September 3, 2008

9-0-2-1-OLD

Had a viewing party yesterday for the premiere of the new 90210.



Toilets were decorated.




Nat's Peach Pit Pie was consumed.




Pin-the-Sideburn-on-the-Brandon was played, with mixed results.


5 REASONS WHY IT'S BETTER THAN THE ORIGINAL

1. More of what makes TV drama so wonderful: swearing, sexual innuendo, blowjobs

2. Feisty drunk grandma is feisty. And drunk

3. Noveau David Silver character much, much hotter than original

4. Girl who plays Naomi has same haircut as Naomi in Showgirls

5. Rather than basketball player or political militant swathed in kente cloth,* sole black character gets to play stupid rich kid, like everybody else

5 REASONS WHY WE SHOULD HAVE LEFT IT ALONE

1. Females so thin they look like Blythe dolls

2. Parents way too young/hot. Carol & Jim let Bran and Bren get away with shit real parents never would but at least they looked the part

3. Brenda character is adorably clumsy/goofy charming a la Terri Hatcher in Desperate Housewives. Oops! I tripped! Aren't I adorable? Look, I don't care if you throw yourself down 5 flights of steps and spill Dr. Pepper on the Pope. I'm never going to buy that a stunning 5'10 chick with long silky hair and perfectly straight teeth is a social outcast. It's geek blackface, it's offensive, and I'm not buying it

4. Real Brenda keeps smiling. On anyone else this would be pleasant but on Ms. B it's unnerving. Is it in her new contract? Bad Botox?

5. Still not clear on who's supposed to be Dylan. The guy in the French cuffs? Ethan the cheater? That guy's a yo-yo.


*Seasons 5 & Season 2 of original, respectively

3 comments:

Doc Endshank said...

Naomi in Show Girls was Nomi in Show Girls....

JP said...

Geek blackface = my new favorite phrase.

ang said...

haha! I was working on the ad campaign for them. Then they just went with their in-house stock footage which explains the tacky palm tree back drops and cheese-dick smiles.